Losing a loved one is hard, but the loss of a loved one to suicide is even harder. It’s difficult because it’s preventrable, and it’s hard to explain the feeling of helplessness afterward. This collection of poetry details the grief that comes with losing a friend, but it is other things too. Myers explores the loss of family, depression, and sexual assault. There are a handful of good poems, such as The Girl Becomes Gasoline which was what made me decide to pick this book up.
Several of the poems reference the death of Mac Miller, who had died of an accidental drug overdose in 2018. Myers mentions how Mac Miller had passed around the same time that she had lost one of her best friends to suicide, talking about plans unfinished. What happened to Mac Miller is tragic and he should certainly be remembered, and maybe I just don’t understand American celebrity culture, but the fact that he was brought up over and over felt out of place. But I digress, as a whole, the collection is pretty decent. The themes of the book are true to life and I appreciated Myer’s willingness to share her authentic self.
“I don’t know when I became a space to be filled. My thigh an open lease, my neck a wishing well, and his hot breath, a coin, a demand, cast into me.”
Trigger Warning: Death, Suicide, Sexual Assault, Sexual Harassment